Last day of my college....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last day of my college....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"कल कॉलेज बंद हो जाएगा , तुम अपने घर को जाओगे , फिर एक लड़का एक लड़की से .........!!!!!"
this was my heart .....crying and singing this song continuously...... I saw this song many times be4 , but never felt this song too close to my heart.......!!!!!!!
पूरा दिन कैसे  बीत गया पता ही नही चला.
मैंने बहुत चाहा की दिल को दिमाग पे हावी न होने दूँ. no sentiments ...  it makes a man weak......cut out ur heart frm ur body....n be happy.....!!! this was my mind .....suggesting me to do this. never attach to any thing , any body.......
पर दिल और दिमाग में कसमकश जारी है........
दिल - चार साल कैसे गुजर गए पता हीं नही चला. वो क्लास रूम जिसे मैं  बहुत hate  करता था ...आज पता नही क्यूँ वो अछा सा लग लग  रहा था .
किसी ने सच ही कहा है ...की जब तक जो चीज हमारे पास होती है , तब तक उसकी कदर नही होती.
जब वो चीज हमसे दूर होने लगती है तब उसकी value का अंदाजा होता है.वो एक एक चीज जिससे मैं बहुत नफरत करता था कभी...आज उन सब से  मुझे लगाव सा होने लगा था.

दिमाग- ये क्या सोच रहा है. लाइफ में कभी भी emotional  नही होने का.....लोग आते जाते रहते हैं लाइफ में ....फिर नयी जगह , नए लोग ... तू चाहता था न की जल्दी से ये जगह छोड़ दूँ. अब क्या हुआ? अब ये रोना-धोना क्यों?
नयी दुनिया में नयी जिंदगी शुरू कर.  क्या पाया है तुने यहाँ ? तेरी हर चाहत पूरी नही हुई.

दिल - पर क्या जिंदगी  सिर्फ खोने और पाने का नाम है ? क्या जिंदगी सिर्फ  सफल होने का नाम है ?
 बिना दिल के,  emotions के आदमी जिन्दा रह सकता है क्या ? क्या मैं mechine  बन गया हूँ?
 आखिर मैं ऐसा क्यूँ हो raha hun???
आज कॉलेज में घूमना कितना अच्छा लग रहा है. सारे दोस्त ..अपनी जिंदगी क पुरे चार साल जो मैंने यहाँ बिता दिए .......
आज न जाने क्यूँ बहुत याद आ रहे हैं.......
I hate being emotional...n hate to show it .....but why i m  crying ???
n why i m walking alone to hide my emotions from ppl  ????
NO answer ......
n fight between heart and mind still continues............
Can u help me ???????

purv premi ka khat

A very nice mail i got from my friend ..
hope u will enjoy it also....

My gravestone speaks........

I was laying on my grave,

finally at complete rest,

thought , this is my place ,

completely mine.

No much space,

but still i was fully satisfied,

leaving the world & relations of mine!

A peace of land,

under i was sleeping,

U may think, i m dead,

but U got me wrong,

all world seems, a drama to me,

finally u will b here,

today or tomorrow!!!

now i feel tired ,

was planning, mixing  up with soil,

after  some time, u hardly find me here,

not a single evidence of mine!!!

 But I was wrong!!!

another one entered in my grave!!!

before i completely lost!!!

before i completely sleep!!!

even this peace of land was not mine!!!

           Not mine!!!

B.Tech is Incompleted without.........

B.Tech is incompleted without 5 B's :

Bunk...........

Beer..............

Bike.................

Babes...................

Backlogs.................

I got an SMS, from a new no.

"who can be this person???", I thought. OK!, I dialed that no.

"This no is not available, plz check the no. and dial again", Heared a sweet voice.

I laughed, this may be a lesson from god,  he is happy wid me, n showed me direction to live life of these four years of B.Tech. I was to delete that msg, but donno why, I stopped, and saved that no. may be in future I will also get some msg...

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Bunks

....Mission accomplished in 1st Semester....."Cool and Fundooo........I m",I said to myself.

Wen all Ghissu type ppl....having lot of dreams in their eyes......I will do this...i will do that .....was busy with attending Class...I was OUT of the class......In ccn ...chatting on Rediff Bol.....after dat Orkut....den LAN Gaming  over days n nights .....sometimes whole night in CCN ..playing Cs (Counter Strike)....One time ..I misbeahved the teacher ..also .....he was on the round to check ...wat the students are doing on intrnet....I was winning the game...smone patted on my back.......i ignored...again ....

"Dekhta nahi hai kya...I m winning ...Don't disturb me ...Teri *** ki .... Are!!! it's FASHION n proud ...how much n how frequent u use those **** WORDS....Aakhir mujhe bhi to aacha Engineer banna tha ......!

No response...Suddenly a loud Voice, "Stand Up n follow..U don't know manners ...is it way to talk to ur teacher !!!!"

I stunned ...Oh my god!!!! , he is teacher ....  ......Nw i m going to fucked up completly........Be brave...will seE ....My heart was ..OUT OF CONTROL...like aftr running .....

I came outside of CCN......OHo!!! so much ppl including sm batchmates n also Siniors.....they all were standing in a row...bended head....I was 16th in the row..I counted. Nw I was relaxed. I m not alone, these ppl are also with me. I remembered a Quote-"Unity is Strength".

ahead me a short thin guy, he was not from my year. "Are U from 1st year??" I asked.

"No Idiot, I m from Prefinal, Ur Grand father!!!"he murmured.

Mador****, U r also in this row, like me, I wanted to say, but remained silent.

Teacher shouted,"Give  Ur I'Cards and go. U all are banned for 2 month. Don't dare to enter here!!!".

I was trying to hide and like all I moved out from line. But my bad luck, he called me"You rascal, u abused me!!, ok! I will teach u, how to beahave!!.

He was very angry, he was famous as the coolest teacher of my branch, upcoming branch, but today ....i knew this latter in 2nd year.

Now every one knew my GOOD WORK, my adventureous work to abuse the teacher.....

"Get Lost!!" teacher said and was on the way to his home.

I was following the teacher, on 1:00 am in night. "Sorry Sir!! don't get me wrong , I m not a bad guy" I tried to explain him.

He stopped,"Either U r very smart, or I m very FOOL". "Isn't it, wat u think???", he asked.

I wished,"May i tell him the truth" and smiled.

"Go back, I don't want to see u again idiot!!", he was trembling with anger and hate.

I returned to my hostel. I was in suspicion nw. "That msg was from god or from devil". I was confused. I tossed a coin, " Head, this msg is from god and tail, this is from demon".

It was head, means i have to follow completly that msg.

I sympathised, "Don't worry, It's god wish that i sud go in right direction".

I was serious to acieve my next target.......BEAR........from where to got dat....I was planning .......

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Beer........

Tried hand in 2nd Semester.....Bear ....Daaru.....I was successfully on the way to be a real B.Tech Engineer.....Hey don't get me wrong ........I was not born drunk .......but B.Tech ....N all here the customs here  made me ......Wen all the parties without Daaruu n Sutta ......U can't imagine ...

"WAT!!! U got A+ IN THIS SUBJECT ....party man ....just one drink ....Let's Go to THEKKA".

"SHIT yaar!!! I failed in this Subject ....chalto pite hain ...bahut gum hai  aaj..chalo THEKKA chalo"

Sukh ho ya Dukh ....har pal k saathi to bas THEKKA  hi hai .....

SORRY ..I forgot to tell , THEKKA is the heaven for us Engineers..this heant is enough ...didn't understand yet..let'me clear ...yaar it's shop for all daarus... every Brand ......

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To be continued

On the 1st day of New year!!!